Since the beginning of this new semester,
I've been repeatedly disappointed and frustrated with myself,
and the work I was producing in studio.
I feel that most of it was due to my standard rising,
as I'm not satisfied with just okay anymore.
I want to be better. I want to be great.
Pushing myself harder had its negative consequences too,
as I kept reflecting back to myself and thought, am I not good enough?
It was a serious downer and a morale crusher.
However, slowly, I'm rising up to my own standard.
Today felt amazing.
I challenged my professor's suggestion, and my professor actually agreed that
my challenge was the better decision, rather than her own.
A guest speaker came in, and when I presented him my model,
he seemed very intrigued and impressed.
I heard him utter in a low voice as he put my model back on the table,
"fantastic."
After such days of beating myself down,
encouraging and reassuring words were just what I needed.
I feel like I'm walking on the right path.
So far, so good.